On my way down to the Outer Banks, I stopped at my friend Tina’s in Virginia for the night, to break up the drive.
As I sat on her couch, chatting with her, I reached for a pillow and covered my stomach with it. I haven’t done that in years.
For the past several months, I’ve looked at the number on the scale, refused to believe it, and kept coming up with a new excuse to justify it.
Oh, it must be water weight. I must be PMS-ing. Maybe something I ate had too much salt in it. Maybe my clothes are really heavy. This isn’t real weight gain.
At the beach, we had lots of delicious, indulgent, not at all healthy food. I took a plate…and then went back for more….every night…and every morning at breakfast. One night, I got sick to my stomach because I’d eaten so much – a feeling that used to be all too familiar, and that I certainly don’t miss.
In isolation, these are all fine. (Well, maybe not eating until you feel sick.) Combined? This makes me nervous that I’m going to fall down that slippery slope of gaining all the weight back.
Maybe you saw me Instagramming pictures of Blueprint Cleanse today? I’d always said I’d never do a cleanse, but as I’ve heard more about them lately, I’ve been intrigued. Yesterday, the juices were on sale at Whole Foods so I decided to give a one-day cleanse a try. Am I expecting to lose weight from one day? Nope. Well, maybe a little water weight tomorrow but I know that’s not a permanent thing. No, I really just wanted a way to pump a bunch of nutrients into me and start to reset some of the unhealthier habits I’ve picked up over the past few months to make sure any recent weight gain isn’t permanent. I’ll do a more in-depth post about the cleanse and my thoughts on it soon, but I wanted to mention it in context with the beginning of the post.
I think that trying to be a “perfect” eater can be equally unhealthy, and I don’t want to follow a strict diet, so I’m just going to say this: more cooking for myself, less wine. Those are my two health downfalls.
Have you ever done a cleanse? Would you? I’m not sure if I’d ever do one for more than a day (by the way, doing it on a nice day in June in NYC? Walking past lots of al fresco diners? Sorta torturous.)
How do you reset when you’ve gained some weight or see yourself slipping back into old habits you thought you’d moved away from?
Unrelated: My running coach, Jess, BQ-ed at San Diego! Go read her recap and congratulate her!